Caddis Eyewear founder, Tim Parr talks with his daughter, dancer AJ Tasley Parr, about her struggle to get sober and she wonders what Whalebone is
Tim Parr wears many hats. Mostly he is seen with one type of hat on but figuratively he wears many—such is the life of an entrepreneur who started one of the more successful eyeglasses companies that we know. Maybe it should have been “Tim Parr wears many glasses.” No one would have really understood that. Regardless of the metaphor Tim is a badass. Badass enough that when asked to interview one person he admires he did not select one of his super famous friends or clients that wear CADDIS glasses, he selected his daughter, who is a graduate of the Boston Conservatory and dances professionally in NYC (she’s 27
and has been sober for five years … and counting). Maybe he should have a hat that says “Father of the year.”
There are a lot of people in unique situations in the world today and we’re thankful to Tim and AJ for shedding some light on a thing that most wouldn’t choose to talk about.
Tim Parr: What’s something that parents of alcoholic kids might not know?
AJ Tasley Parr: I didn’t puke in your car because I didn’t like your car.
AJ: But actually… it’s that their kid’s drinking isn’t out of spite or to be rebellious. When it’s at the level of alcoholism, we don’t have control over the amount we drink or the way we behave when we’re loaded. A lot of the time we are experiencing emotional pain so we use alcohol to ease that. Long story short, don’t take it personally.
Tim: Yeah…that part really sucks for parents because our instincts are to fix things for our kids.
AJ: I think it can be hard because alcoholism isn’t something that just affects one person, it affects everyone around them. That’s why they call it a family disease.
Tim: You mean like our family’s genetic predisposition to boanthropy?
Tim: Google it…
AJ: Yeahhh, no.
Tim: So, as your dad, what could have I done differently?
AJ: Nothing. What people don’t understand is that it’s not something that a parent can fix. I had to get to the point where I was ready to get sober myself.
Remember when I ran away from rehab?
Tim: Funny not funny.
AJ: It took me getting to a really dark place in order to make any changes in my life and this had nothing to do with you or mom. It wasn’t until I felt my life would be better without the alcohol that I knew that was what I wanted. To be honest I have my therapist to thank for that. Shout out to Jared.
It wasn’t until I felt my life would be better without the alcohol that I knew that was what I wanted.
Tim: Would you say this is something that you have overcome?
AJ: Yes and no. I will always be an alcoholic but I now have a new set of tools to cope with my shit rather than picking up a drink.
Tim: So hypothetically speaking… I’m on the couch with a guitar, and you’re in the kitchen. Would you deliver a beer to me?
AJ: I wouldn’t do that either way. Disease or no disease. What is this for again?
Tim: Eddie at Whalebone Magazine … and no you’re not getting paid for this.
AJ: Who’s Eddie?
Tim: He started Whalebone.
AJ: Never heard of it… I gotta go, Dad…
Tim: OK, this was fun, but in all seriousness, we couldn’t be more proud of you. You’ve achieved something many people sadly never will. I love you and thank you for being you.
AJ: Love you, too… bye.