Greetings from America: A Guide to All 50 States

Things you might not have known about the states in the United States

America is diverse. And that diversity is what makes it great. If the entire United States was all the same, that might be boring, and boring is boring. And you’re not boring. You like adventure and learning about new things and having new experiences. You likely understand that by appreciating other cultures, other backgrounds and history you can grow and have more fun. And isn’t having fun what this is really all about? Well, our life at Whalebone Magazine is about defeating our accountant in ping pong and selling bottles of hot sauce, but mostly, it’s about fun. And in America, there are 50 states and they are all diverse. Except for South Dakota and North Dakota, they’re pretty much exactly the same, but every other state is diverse and fun and great and weird and full of mostly good humans. Greetings from America. Here are some good things to know about the United States of America.


Population: 5 million | State captial: Montgomery | Known for: Forrest Gump 

A helpful tip to start. Do not wrestle bears in Alabama. Because bear wrestling is illegal in Alabama. It is actually illegal in Alabama to sell, purchase, possess, or train a bear for bear wrestling. A felony charge, Yogi. Also, 43 percent of all snails in the United States live in Alabama.


Population: 730,000  | State captial: Juneau | Known for: Fish that swim upstream

Alaska is twice the size of Texas and in 1867, Russia agreed to sell Alaska to the United States for $7.2 million. Not sure how much mushrooms cost in Russia but pretty sure they could have made a mint off shipping over their comrades and selling them some Little Debbie’s of the Earth while watching the Aurora Borealis (aka the northern lights). You snooze you lose, Russia. But if you’re thinking about going to experience the northern lights, do it right and stay at the Borealis Basecamp Lodge located 25 miles from the city of Fairbanks.


Population: 7 million | State captial: Phoenix | Known for: Being hot as fuck

You know that dream where the Gatorade company made an entire waterfall out of the flavor Cool Blue and you wanted to go swim in it? Well, hidden inside the Grand Canyon, on the reservation of the local Havasupai tribe, lies your dream come true. Havasupai Falls. It’s a casual 10-mile hike into the Grand Canyon and you have to obtain permission from the local tribe and a permit before entering the reservation. Tread lightly.


Population: 3 million | State captial: Little Rock | Known for: Saxophone-playing president

Looking to kill an afternoon in Berryville, Arkansas? Resident Dale Ertel opens his property to visitors looking to learn about his favorite subject: snakes. In a trailer on his land, Ertel houses more than 70 snakes—of the large, venomous, and horrifying variety—and charges between $4 and $7 to anyone looking to come and pet his snakes. Arkansas, amirite?


Population: 39.5 million | State captial: Sacramento | Known for: The ground moving beneath your feet

The oldest living tree on Earth is said to be in California and is more than 4,700 years old. Cali also has the tallest tree on Earth, apparently clocking in at 379.1 feet. Spoiler alert, they’re not the same tree. One is in the White Mountains and the other is outside of San Francisco, which is where the first pair of jeans ever made was made by Levi Strauss in 1873. This is the America Issue—getting in as much as we can here.


Population: 5.7 million | State captial: Denver | Known for: PFM

Terms to know that will help people live better in the Mile-High State. “14er,” shorthand for a mountain with a peak at 14 thousand feet in elevation. Colorado has 53 mountains that are 14ers. Hiker’s dream. Another term, “Colorado Kool-Aid” is code for beer. This was originally a dad joke from 1983 and just stuck. Caution, drinking a bunch of Colorado Kool-Aid and jumping on a horse to go do a 14er is not advised because it is illegal to ride a horse on drugs or alcohol in Colorado. We blame the cowboys and the dads.


Population: 3.5 million | State captial: Hartford | Known for: People who previously lived in New York 

Something to eat: pizza. Well, technically in New Haven, Connecticut it’s called “apizza,” not pizza. And hard to believe the northern neighbor of New York City can claim some of the best dough in the world but they do it with style. Any pizza parlor worth its weight in paper plates carries a good white clam pizza. Also, the PEZ Candy Company is based in Connecticut, if you ever need to stop by. And Meryl Streep and the Maretts live there. Class acts.


Population: 975,000 | State captial: Dover | Known for: Tax evasion

Home to the world’s largest collection of hot sauces, Bethany Beach, and likely more mini-golf courses than any other place in America. And here’s one for you, Bob Marley lived in Delaware for 12 of the 36 years of his life. From 1965 to 1977 Bob Marley lived in this mid-Atlantic jewel. He was age 20 to 32 when he lived in the Delmarva. There is no confirmation if the three little birds were from Delaware but it’s safe to think so. Every little thing is gonna be alright.


Population: 21.5 million | State captial: Tallahassee | Known for: Meth and Gardner Minshew

Back in 1996, rollerbladers in Florida did something for the world that has changed all our lives for the better. True story. The snazzy boot scooters were regularly getting kicked out of grocery stores, restaurants and banks for blading in and refusing to remove their mobile footwear. So a bank in Miami decided to help this growing group of rebels out and created the world’s first automated teller machine outside the bank so rollerbladers could get cash without having to come inside. Rollerbladers from Florida helped create the ATM. Florida, we love/hate you. Also, it is estimated that there is over 2 TRILLION DOLLARS worth of lost sunken treasure hidden within 60 miles of the coast of Florida. Two other things for the dinner table conversation, St. Augustine, Florida is the oldest town in America and still, no one knows what happened to Pony Boy.


Population: 10.6 million | State captial: Atlanta | Known for: millions of peaches, peaches for me

Killer Mike, Waka Flocka, CeeLo Green, Childish Gambino, Gucci Mane, Ludacris and Outkast. All from Georgia. Probably means there should likely be a giant pool party every night in Atlanta but there is not because of the big C you-know-what but there is one of the world’s largest aquariums. No swimming pools that we know of at the aquarium. But relatively close by is The Varsity, the world’s largest drive-in restaurant, which makes on average two miles of hot dogs, 2,500 pounds of potatoes, 5,000 fried pies and 300 gallons of chili from scratch daily. If you happen to be hanging out with a giraffe in Georgia, do not tie it to a telephone pole, that is outlawed.


Population: 1.4 million | State captial: Honolulu | Known for: John John Florence 

The 50th state was the first to ban plastic bags, is short on snakes, banned sunscreens that are harmful to the reefs, banned smoking on beaches and somehow has the longest life expectancy of residents of any state at an average of 81.3 years. But that last fact likely has nothing to do with the first four.


Population: 1.8 million | State captial: Boise | Known for: Potatoes or potatoes

You did it. You’re not very far into this magazine and you get to find out where a bed and breakfast shaped entirely like a giant dog next to a chainsaw art gallery is located in America. The Dog Park Inn in Cottonwood, Idaho can inconveniently be found in the middle of nowhere but it does have a B&B shaped entirely like a pretty cute beagle and right next door to a chainsaw art gallery. Idaho also shares a border with Canada that is only 42 miles long.


Population: 12.6 million | State captial: Springfield | Known for: Wayne & Garth

Yes, the first McDonald’s opened up in 1955 in Des Plaines, Illinois. Yes, Robert Pershing Wadlow, also known as the world’s tallest man, was born in Alton, Illinois and was last recorded in 1940 being 8’11” and wore a size 37 shoe. And yes, Wrigley Field in Chicago is the second-best ballpark in the country. But if you want to take this state seriously the lineup from The Second City comedy scene is the proper bit of things to know about including: Bill Murray, Gilda Radner, John Candy, John Belushi, Dan Aykroyd, Eugene Levy, Catherine O’Hara, Mike Myers, Steve Carell, Tina Fey, Amy Poehler, Stephen Colbert and likely hundreds of other
people that do well on a stage.


Population: 6.7 million | State captial: Indianapolis | Known for: Hoosiers

Colonel Sanders, the gent who started Kentucky Fried Chicken, was from Indiana, not Kentucky. 90 percent of the popcorn in the world comes from Indiana but one of the better parts of the home of Rudy might be how crucial Indiana was in helping slaves escape to freedom during the Civil War. The community of Newport (now called Fountain City) was considered the “grand central station” of the Underground Railroad. Whole new respect for you, Rudy.


Population: 3.1 million | State captial: Des Moines | Known for: Field of Dreams

Is Iowa “the greatest thing since sliced bread”? Well, yes and no. Otto Frederick Rohwedder was apparently sick and tired of having to eat an entire loaf of bread cut once and filled with peanut butter and jelly, so in 1912, he invented a device that would easily and quickly cut bread into consistently-sized smaller slices. The invention of sliced bread.


Population: 2.9 million | State captial: Topeka | Known for: Getting Dorothy to Oz

Three important real laws to follow if you’re in Kansas. Do not sing the alphabet while wandering the Topeka streets at night. Rabbits cannot be shot from a motorboat and mules cannot be used for duck hunting. Wabbit season. You’re welcome.


Population: 4.4 million | State captial: Frankfort | Known for: Betting on the ponies

The number of bourbon barrels currently aging in Kentucky distilleries outnumbers the state’s population (5.6 million barrels vs. 4.4 million humans, respectively). The longest known cave system in the world, Mammoth Cave, is located in southern Kentucky. Spelunkers are off to the races after they stop to eat a Hot Brown sandwich.


Population: 4.6 million | State captial: Baton Rouge | Known for: Jazz and Snake and Jake’s Christmas Club Lounge

Besides being the Crawfish Capital of the World. Dog Trot Capital of the World. Frog Capital of the World. Cajun Music Capital of the World. Duck Capital of America. And Rice Capital of the World, Louisiana is home to Tabasco who still makes some of the best sauce in the world over on Avery Island. “Laissez les bons temps rouler.”


Population: 1.4 million | State captial: Augusta | Known for: Lobstahs

But should it be known for blueberries? Violet you’re turning violet. All things considered, Maine pops out 99 percent of the blueberries in the United States and only 90 percent of the lobsters. Also, you can be fined for keeping your Christmas decorations up past January 14 in
The Pine Tree State. So if you hate blueberries, the ocean, and love procrastination, maybe skip Maine.


Population: 6 million | State captial: Annapolis | Known for: Crab cakes and football

The first Ouija board was invented in Baltimore, Maryland—in an apartment that is now a 7-Eleven. That 7-Eleven does not sell Ouija boards. Which is kind of a miss. The story goes that creator Elijah Bond and medium Helen Peters asked the “talking board” what it wanted to be called. “O-U-I-J-A,” the board allegedly replied. Bond’s relationship with his other wordy creation was so strong that it followed him into death; there’s a Ouija board engraved on the back of his tombstone. Not creepy at all.


Population: 6.9 million | State captial: Boston | Known for: Salem Witch Trials and zero quarterbacks

Lake Chaubunagungamaug exists here. Longest name of a place in the United States. But let’s talk about terms you might need to know that are relevant. “Packie” is a store that sells cigs and beer. “Clicker,” a remote control for your TV. “Dunkies” refers to Dunkin Donuts. “Red Sox,” worst baseball team in the country.


Population: 9.9 million | State captial: Lansing | Known for: Lakes

Yoopers (everyone on the Upper Peninsula, not just the guys in the band) refer to people from the rest of the state as “trolls” because they live “below the Mackinac Bridge.” Other nicknames are flatlanders and lopers, the latter name being short for Lower Peninsula. The J.W. Westcott II, which operates out of Detroit, is the world’s only floating post office, and it delivers mail to ships as they pass under the Ambassador Bridge. Eminem, Madonna, Magic Johnson, Tom Selleck and Bob Seger already knew most of what you just read as they are from Michigan.


Population: 5.6 million | State captial: Saint Paul | Known for: Indoor roller coasters

The world’s biggest ball of twine made by one person sits in Darwin, Minnesota. Which is about 60 miles away from Minneapolis, Minnesota which according to a analysis, is the coldest major city in America. On average, the city experiences 23 to 25 subzero cold days each year during the months of December, January and February. Can always warm up at Matt’s Bar for a Jucy Lucy. Don’t ask questions, thank us later.


Population: 2.9 million | State captial: Jackson | Known for: River boat gambling

Mississippi has more churches per capita than any other state in America, Elvis was born there and coincidentally more than 1,000,000 soft toilet seats are sold every year out of Columbus, Mississippi thanks to a patent owned by native, David Harrison. And one of the very oldest games in America is stickball. The Choctaw Indians of Mississippi played the game as far back as 1729. There are no coincidences in life.


Population: 6.1 million | State captial: Jefferson City | Known for: Mark Twain

Anheuser-Busch Brewery in St. Louis, Missouri is the largest beer producing plant in the nation. You could also swim in the Ozarks and buy a casino and launder money for a Mexican drug cartel. Not sure if there are swimming holes in the caves of Missouri but there are weddings—more than 3,000 weddings have been performed at Bridal Cave in Camdenton, Missouri.


Population: 1.1 million | State captial: Helena | Known for: Fly fishing

In Montana, the word “ditch” can be used to order a drink. It means “with water.” “I’d like a Jack Daniel’s ditch, please” means, “I’d like a Jack Daniel’s and water.” Evel Knievel was from Montana. And he liked to jump over ditches. Less daredevil and more calm but the largest recorded snowflake fell during a storm in 1887 in Montana. It was measured at 15 inches wide. The fourth largest state in the U.S. with the 44th largest population. A river runs through it.


Population: 1.9 million | State captial: Lincoln | Known for: Briefly being known as the “Bugeater State” (true story)

Bar owners are legally required to be “brewing a kettle of soup” when selling beer in Omaha, Nebraska. Could be that the soup was for an orangutan at the Omaha’s Henry Doorly Zoo named Fu Manchu, who was known to climb through air vents and pick locks with a piece of metal wiring he kept hidden and he loved soup and beer. Or maybe he was trying to escape to visit a Runza. Any other questions on The Cornhusker State may be directed to Warren Buffett. The elder billionaire currently lives in the five-bedroom home in Omaha, Nebraska, that he bought in 1958 for $31,500. And he never spends more than $3.17 on breakfast and eats at McDonald’s every morning.


Population: 3 million | State captial: Carson City | Known for: Elvis impersonators

Las Vegas has more hotel rooms than any other place on Earth. But that’s for humans who might like to hide out for a few days. The real rooms for hiding are about 82 miles from the Vegas Strip at Homey Airport near a heavily guarded secret Air Force base. And the sum of all the numbers on a roulette wheel equal 666. And Virginia City in the state is believed to be the most haunted town in the U.S. It’s like Nevada is trying to tell us something…

New Hampshire

Population: 1.3 million | State captial: Concord | Known for: The Flume Gorge 

The 1995 hit movie Jumanji was filmed in Keene roughly 25 years before the entire world felt like it was in a strange-sci-fi-world board game waiting on someone to roll the dice. Love you 2020. Also, under law, you may not sell the clothes that you are wearing to settle a gambling debt in New Hampshire, so be mindful of that.

New Jersey

Population: 8.9 million | State captial: Trenton | Known for: Taylor Ham (Pork Roll) and Bruce Springsteen

New Jersey has the most diners in the world (525) and (1) Ben Gravy. Maybe not as important, but the light bulb, phonograph (record player) and motion picture projector were invented by Thomas Edison in his Menlo Park laboratory. But very important is that all the places in the game Monopoly are named after actual street names in Atlantic City. New York Ave. is still the best you can own.

New Mexico

Population: 2 million | State captial: Santa Fe | Known for: Turquoise

In 1950, the little cub that became the National Fire Safety symbol, Smokey the Bear, was found trapped in a tree when his home in Lincoln National Forest was destroyed by a fire. Smart group of folks in New Mexico as they boast more PhD holders per capita than any other state in the country. Smart enough to know that dancing while wearing your sombrero is illegal in the great state of New Mexico. And they seem decent enough because in Carlsbad, New Mexico, it’s legal for couples to have sex in a parked vehicle during their lunch break from work, as long as the car or van has drawn curtains to stop strangers from peeking in . Only you can prevent a forest fire and indecent exposure.

New York

Population: 19.5 million | State captial: Albany | Known for: Subway performers

More than 800 different languages are spoken in New York City, making it the most linguistically diverse city in the world. Also, virtually every skyscraper built in New York is the result of the hard work and fearless attitude of the Mohawk ironworkers. The ironworkers belonging to this tribe have an innate talent to withstand pressure and complete their task while working at great heights. These buildings are good news for the small handful of peregrine falcons who live at the top of some of the tallest structures in NYC. The rare birds can fly at top speeds of 200 mph. Fuggedaboutit.

North Carolina

Population: 10.5 million | State captial: Raleigh | Known for: Coach K

Michael Jordan is from the Tar Heel State. The first miniature golf course was built in Fayetteville, North Carolina which means the first winner at miniature golf was in North Carolina. Krispy Kreme Doughnuts was founded in Winston-Salem. Maybe the best donuts. The Wright Brothers flew the first plane in Kitty Hawk, North Carolina. Winners in aviation. More American Idol finalists are from North Carolina than any other state. But Blackbeard the pirate would probably steal your trophy case if he was around. Fortunately for you the infamous sailor is not. He was killed off the coast of North Carolina in 1718.

North Dakota

Population: 762,062 | State captial: Bismarck | Known for: Fargo

The world’s largest hamburger ever eaten was in Rutland, North Dakota. It weighed 3,591 pounds and more than 8,000 people were invited to the meal. It was successfully eaten. Kinda weird but so far we’re keeping pace with America. After the great burger feast, we hope there would have been an influx of people going to hike the Maah Daah Hey Trail. 140 miles of iconic North Dakota super rad landscapes, such as Badlands, the Little Missouri River Valley and portions of Theodore Roosevelt National Park. Would take you about 10 days. No burger joints on the trail. BYOB.


Population: 11.7 million | State captial: Columbus | Known for: Causing people to google “Buckeye” to figure out what one is

If you’re considering having a child maybe consider driving to Ohio before delivering. Seven US Presidents, 25 astronauts and Woody Harrelson were born in Ohio, making it home to some of the most influential minds of our time. But maybe don’t take your young kids to Columbus until they’re older. In the state capital they have a 8-foot 600-lb, bronze statue of a mostly-naked Arnold Schwarzenegger. But feel free to take them to Newark, Ohio, there’s a building there shaped like a giant basket and is seven stories high and 180,000 square feet. Kids will love it. Hey look kids, there’s Big Ben.


Population: 4 million | State captial: Oklahoma City | Known for: The wind coming sweepin’ down the plain

Something to make you pick up your phone: One of the following is not true. In Oklahoma there is a Big Foot Festival to try and find the mysterious figure, the nation’s first tornado warning was issued in Oklahoma, whaling is illegal there, there is a town called Cookietown in Oklahoma, or Wendy’s drive-thrus are the official food of Oklahoma. Send your guess to O-K-L-A-H-O-M-A!


Population: 4.2 million | State captial: Salem| Known for: Craft beer

Portland has the highest number of strip clubs per capita in the country. But the video game Oregon Trail gave more people dysentery than all the strip clubs in Portland ever will. Driving from Portland to Astoria, Oregon is worth the two-hour adventure away from Bambi and Sapphire. The Goonies was shot in Astoria and if you look hard enough locals say One-Eye Willy still has rubies and treasure buried off the coast. Baby Ruth. Also, Jason from Portugal. The Man has great donut suggestions in the Oregon area if you ever see him.


Population: 13 million | State captial: Harrisburg | Known for: Amish furniture makers 

There is no Chili’s in Scranton, Pennsylvania. There is one about 20 miles away in Wilkes-Barre but we were led to believe that Michael Scott and the Dunder Mifflin crew spent many happy hours and lunches getting baby back baby back baby back ribs in Scranton. Have we all been lied to? Is Schrute Farms also not real? Look, Pennsylvania we know you’re playing a big role in November but we need some answers. People we can ask that are from Pennsylvania are Will Smith, The Roots, Taylor Swift, Jeff Goldblum and Tina Fey. While we find out answers, Dalessandro’s Steaks and Hoagies has the best cheesesteaks in Philadelphia.

Rhode Island

Population: 1 million | State captial: Providence | Known for: Hospitality in Point Judith and Del’s Lemonade

The state is only 37 miles wide and 48 miles long so after you drive around the entire state in about an hour consider swimming over to Block Island. Actually that’s horrible advice, don’t swim, you’d probably drown. It’s 11 miles out in the ocean so taking a ferry is a much more practical adventure. Less sharks. The island is home to about 1,000 people. If making the trip consider stopping by Ballard’s, The Oar, and Spring House or Atlantic Inn. Mudslides are a common local drink that you should consider buying anyone on the Whalebone team one if you ever meet them in person there.

South Carolina

Population: 5.1 million | State captial: Columbia | Known for: Sweet tea

Bit of bad news on this one. There are no major professional sports teams in South Carolina. That’s right, no NFL, NHL, NBA, MLS, or MLB. Sorry. The Charleston RiverDogs, however, are by far the best minor league or college sports team in the state. Other terrible news, it is illegal to fish with a yo-yo or dynamite in the fine state of South Carolina. And you can’t even legally buy or sell an electric eel, also against the law. Good news at the end of this one though, Bill Murray lives in South Carolina.

South Dakota

Population: 884,659 | State captial: Pierre | Known for: The World Famous Mashed Potato Wrestling Contest

Fun fact: South Dakota has more miles of shoreline than the state of Florida (Ben Gravy surfed both Dakotas in one day). South Dakota is maybe the most actually American state: it’s got one of the largest American Indian populations, with nine tribes and an estimated 60,000 people currently living there, the buffalo actually roam here, with the largest roaming herd in the U.S. near the Standing Butte Ranch near Pierre and, it is also home on the range to a prairie dog settlement that’s about 100 by 250 miles, containing an estimated 400 million prairie dogs. Lots of prairie dog walking jobs.


Population: 6.8 million | State captial: Nashville | Known for: The Grand Ole Opry

The actual word, “Tennessee” comes from the Cherokee Native American word, “Tana-see.” This means, “The Meeting Place.” A place where Jasper Newton “Jack” Daniel met a good idea and opened the first distillery in the United States. But bad news: these days the best-selling American whiskey is made in an area where it cannot be sold. Lynchburg in Moore County, Tennessee has been a dry county since Prohibition, even after Repeal. While you can tour the Jack Daniel’s facility and taste the whiskeys (only on the “enhanced tour”), you can’t buy Jack Daniel’s in the town it’s made in.


Population: 30 million | State captial: Austin | Known for: Being big

Dr Pepper was invented in Waco, Texas in 1885. There is no period after the Dr in Dr Pepper. That’s not a typo left in for the proofreader of this magazine. But the majority of restaurants in the world don’t serve Dr Pepper for some reason. So you could always drink a Ranch Water also known as a drink in Texas made with lime, tequila and Topo Chico. You could likely order one of these at Donn’s Depot in Austin, TX. One of the greatest dive bars in America.


Population: 3.2 million | State captial: Salt Lake City | Known for: Rock formations

The Jell-O capital of the world. More Jello is eaten in Utah than anywhere else. Whoever is in charge of Jello marketing is doing really great in Utah. Also questionable—in 1971, a BYU student apparently hijacked a plane in Utah and collected $500,000 in ransom and then successfully escaped by jumping out of a plane with a parachute. What the hell is going on in Utah? Someone get Karl Malone on the phone.


Population: 623,989 | State captial: Montpelier | Known for: Ben & Jerry’s, Phish and Burton

The hippies have it figured out and we hope they’re building a giant hippie complex based on the values and lifestyle of Vermont that we can go live in one day. Billboards are banned in the state. The state capital doesn’t have a McDonald’s and there’s a law that says, “When serving apple pie in Vermont, a ‘good faith’ effort shall be made to serve it with: (a) a glass of cold milk, (b) a slice of cheddar cheese, (c) a large scoop of vanilla ice cream.” Maybe the cleanest state in America. Definitely the most relaxed.


Population: 8.5 million | State captial: Richmond | Known for: East Coast Surfing Championships

It’s a bridge. It’s a tunnel. It’s 18 miles of the worst fear of a claustrophobic person who hates bridges. The Chesapeake Bay Bridge Tunnel is the world’s largest bridge-tunnel complex. Two bridges and two long-ass tunnels. It extends over the mouth of Chesapeake Bay and connects the cities of Cape Charles in Maryland and Norfolk. It’s what driving across the ocean should be like but looks like engineers don’t want us driving across the world just yet. One day maybe.


Population: 7.6 million | State captial: Olympia | Known for: Starbucks 

The Hollywood dream factory is not located in the state of Washington but that didn’t stop a Hollywood set designer from being flown up from California during World War II to create an entire fake neighborhood including fake houses, trees, sidewalks and lights to camouflage a secret bomber-making factory. The intention was to hide the presence of an airplane production facility down below from other potential bombers. That was all before Nirvana and Starbucks but after the 10 state volcanoes were created. Sneaky Washingtonians.

West Virginia

Population: 1.8 million | State captial: Charleston | Known for: Mountain Momma

The song “Country Road, Take Me Home” is about West Virginia. You already knew that, you jukebox hero. But it was almost written as “Massachusetts” rather than “West Virginia” as both four-syllable state names would have fit the song’s meter. That John Denver is full of shit. Other very, very important news is that if you thumb through a Guinness Book of World Records book you’ll see that on January 26, 1960, Danny Heater, a student from Burnsville, West Virginia scored 135 points in a high school basketball game earning him a place in history as the most points ever scored by a single individual in a game. He was also given free chocolate milk in the lunchroom the next day.


Population: 5.8 million | State captial: Madison | Known for: Cheese

Two Rivers, Wisconsin might only have a population of 11,478 but what they lack in population density they make up for in one of the better stories for kids around the world. In 1881, George Hallauer asked Ed Berner, owner of a soda fountain, to top his dish of ice cream with chocolate sauce, hitherto used only for ice cream sodas. It became a popular concoction but was only sold on Sundays. Kids will also need to be reminded not to pee in the pool at Noah’s Ark in Wisconsin Dells, the largest water-themed park in the United States. Don’t think you’re getting out of this without reading about Harry Houdini being from Wisconsin. That was cheesy.


Population: 578,759 | State captial: Cheyenne | Known for: A faithful geyser

Dude, you did it. You learned weird, random, pointless, fun things about 49 states so far. But poor Wyoming is always stuck at the back of the line for everything. However, Wyoming did come up with the term “dude ranch” which language scientists believe was picked up by Southern California surfer guys as just “dude.” So they’re to blame for that. But alternatively, and seriously, dude, we’d be bummed if Grand Teton National Park does not get mentioned in this publication so put that on your lists. Buford, Wyoming has a population of 1. Go bring Don Sammons a cake if you’re in the area…he might be lonely. Last thing, if you wouldn’t mind, please close the fence when you’re finished reading this America Issue of Whalebone if you’re in Wyoming. Any person who fails to close a fence in Wyoming is subject to a fine of up to 750 bucks. And knowing is half the battle.