Comparing Apples to Oranges

Illustrated typography that reads "Comparing apples to oranges" with an illustration of an apple and an orange on a green background.
Martinelli's apple juice logo

The most political statement Whalebone has ever made.

Normally we’re not ones for the hard-hitting hot takes. But for once it’s time to really lay out all of our cards onto the table. To finally make a statement that is incredibly controversial. We’re hoping to not lose any of you in the process and just accept that our opinions on this matter might differ, but to still agree to be kind to one another. Okay here goes—apple juice for breakfast instead of orange juice. Okay wow, it’s out there. What a weight lifted off our shoulders. Let us explain why we prefer apples— 

Cartoon illustration of an apple and orange. The apple on the left-hand side has a smiley face and the orange on the right-hand side has a frowning face.
Rhymes with: 
Appal, appel, appele, appell, cappel, chapel, chappal, chappel, chappell, chapple, crapple, dapple, grapple, happel, kapel, kapell, kapil, kappal, kappel, knapple, lappel, mapel, napil, papel, papille, pappel, rappel, sapele, scapel, scapple, schappell, scrapple, shappell, snapple, stapel, strapple, thrapple
Rhymes with: 
Never have to worry about pulp levels
Too many choices, an absolute controversy 
“An apple a day keeps
the doctor away” 
Good to drink after you’re already sick 
Makes excellent pies Probably terrible pies 
A wonderful gift to show a teacher you appreciate themA strange gift for a teacher 
Apple juice can be served hot or cold and still be deliciousIt is maybe criminal to imagine drinking a hot cup of orange juice 
A representation of knowledgeA representation of Florida